Now comes the issue at hand, like I said I do not totally support modern femininity because in my opinion it mocks the true meaning of women's liberation or women's self worth for the following reasons:
1. Are women truly made free with laws that favour abortion? ( for those of you who know me well, I am pro- life and this is a very important issue for me). Okay, a woman is raped (in some cases by her own relatives) and left with child or she sleeps with her boyfriend/husband and finds out she is pregnant. For a single girl to be pregnant is a taboo in most countries and society as a whole has a way of looking at the woman in scorn forgetting it takes two to tango meaning that the man is also involved, society can be quite hypocritical sometimes. However, My grouse here is this; is it the child's fault she is pregnant? should she take it out on the child? Many people claim that once the child is in his mother's womb he/she does not have rights (a human being is in there!). Do we honestly think this is true? How were we all born? didn't we all have to develop for nine months or is there an alternative means of doing this in order to be protected by the government? does this make a woman truly free? there are so many questions that need to be answered. This process only causes pain and trauma for the woman. We possess motherly characteristics which help us take care of children, a mother develops a strong bond with the child in her womb and I'm pretty sure she would definitely feel some form of regret ( not matter how small) or pain after abortion. So abortion puts a woman in a prison of regret and pain, it does not make her free, what makes her free is her decision not to engage in any sexual activity she does not want, not being forced into such by her husband or boyfriend or rapist! if she wants to engage in such then it is her choice as well but she as a woman should be strong enough to face the consequences of her actions. The government should do something about the crime and make sure the woman and her child are safe, probably compensate her. She doesn't have to keep the child and that is why there are foster homes. It is not the baby's fault.
2. I have often been mesmerised by the saying "if you've got it, flaunt it!" I probably have done so myself a couple of times. Showing off ones assets sometimes makes one feel confident but in the long run would we say it makes us free?
Vulgarity brings nothing but trouble in most cases. We dress according to how comfortable we feel. If one wants to go out stark naked who are we to stop her? she is free isn't she? of course most women don't but most of us do leave very little to the imagination when we dress. I might sound very prudish at this point but I have come to realise dressing in such a way does not make a woman free. If a man is attracted to a woman mainly by what he sees what makes one think he would not be more attracted to the woman who has better assets? and so the world of a woman becomes one big competition; how to attract the most guys and the girls who cannot keep up wallow in misery and insecurity. Is that freedom? A woman in my opinion is by far more than what she wears, it is her intriguing character that draws people close to her, it is that uniqueness she possesses! dressing in an inappropriate manner only brings chains and regret which includes rape, dating the wrong guy and being in the wrong crowd. what we wear does not define us and I believe one can be modest and still very fashionable.Being vulgar does not make a woman free, in my opinion it looks like a desperate search to be noticed, the saying our mothers tell us is so true "a lady is seen not heard" a woman's mannerisms are what make her noticed by all and not by how aggressive she is.
I believe women will definitely be recognized positively in this world but it will only come if we redefine what we call " femininity"
While this was a good read, I was faced wih certain contradictions.
ReplyDeleteYou say, Women have equal rights and should be treated like men in terms of an equal dignity. But you go further to say an aggresive woman is a vice.
Men are programmed (by society)right from childhood to be confident, aggressive and generally strong willed about whatever they set their mind to. why can't a woman do the same?I am in the business world and everyday I see men praised for their aggressiveness in business, how ruthless they are with competition and they are called 'bosses' but if a woman is in those shoes shes called names, mostly negative. IF she dresses as she pleases and has sexual relations , she is a slut , if she stands up for what she belives in and is very confident an doesnt care, she is a bitch.
Women want to be free from the constraints and ideals society sets up for them, which in my opinion is true feminism. she wants to dress in a certain way because she belives it suits her form and physique which the Lord has given her or she wants to be aggressive and bold just like the men because she doesnt believe successful women should be heard and not seen, she wants to be recognised and regarded as an equal.
One should not have to suppress certain aspects of their perosnlaity or expression or your form to prove equality because that is just doing the opposite. Don't get me wrong though, I am all for modesty becasue I belive it boosts self respect.
Thousand of children are raped everyday, the modest of all with religious garmets (Muslim women) are stripped in the middle east and raped of their dignity. For the most part,Its not the dressing or what we say,its the vile men who dominate women becasue they belive they have a right to superiority. We should work on changing the mindset of men by being empowering, telling women they can be who they want to be and do not have to cower at the mercy of bad men.
That said, i think this was a great post. I really like your writing style and your conviction.
I quite agree with you. vulgarity in this sense opposes positive aggression (confidence) and that is what we should fight for; the ability for women to have their voices heard by society which is mostly patriarchal. what I mean by vulgarity is when women claim freedom by acting in an indecent manner or shouting hateful words at men, I agree it could come because of pain sometimes but that action does not make us free, it is our positive actions, the larger positive impact we have on society and our confidence which helps us show the world our true worth. furthermore I agree with you as well, society needs to change their mindset about women. Thank you for your contribution please keep reading to share further ideas.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing is we cannot force society to change their opinion and we cannot force men to change but we can do something for ourselves, we can be better women! we don't need to emulate the vices of men and force society to accept us for that, that is not femininity, men and women although equal in human dignity have different roles to play and in that sense we are different. Like I said earlier it our positive impact that speaks for us.
ReplyDeletewe are freeee,heeeheee....word,nice s baybay1bess you,and you know i always support ur views,keep writing,we want to keep enjoying it.mmwah
ReplyDelete